You Are Here - Life Ain't Always A Box Of Chocolates


You Are Here by Benares

When life is full of crapstorms that muddy up your view of the wondrous world we live in you must learn to wipe it all away and move on. Sometimes you'll find yourself surrounded with crappy people who want to make their muck part of your life, threatening to drown you beneath a pile of their problems, but you've installed wipers and can therefore see through their curtain of crap. You are meant to be a pioneer, a trailblazer, the first person you know who has scaled the mountain of crap that has piled up in their lives and lived to tell about it. Climb past the pile and you'll find the world often smells like roses, but let the pile overtake you and you'll never be rid of the stench...

Don't let life's crap get you down, throw on this You Are Here t-shirt by Benares and smear a smile onto people's faces wherever you go!

Visit Benares's Facebook fan page, official website, Twitter and Tumblr, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more ridiculously cool designs:

Jocovitti's Fishes No One Can Hear You Scream Just Look At The Flowers The Owls Are Not What They Seem

View more designs by Benares | More Funny T-shirts | New T-Shirts

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10 Airlines Offering The Finest Business Class in the Sky

The “business class” airline section is supposed to be one step down from first class. The savings over first class are substantial, yet the seating is still luxuriously comfortable. In some airlines, the business class arrangements are more luxurious than first class in others. Pictured above is Virgin Australia’s new business class cabin.

When Virgin Australia recently unveiled its brand new business class cabin the masses immediately took notice, as did the airline’s competitors. The revamped Virgin Australia business class is all about space, comfort, and convenience and it employs the ever-popular reverse herringbone seating configuration. The new seats can extend up to 80 inches long, which is about the size of a queen bed. 18 inch HD media screens, a better gourmet menu, turn down service, and a lounge area that serves cocktails and tasty bites are just a few things that set Virgin Australia’s business class apart. And, just like Virgin Atlantic, Virgin Australia offers complimentary pajamas for business class passengers.

But it’s far from number one on the list of great business class airlines, the rest of which you can read at Money Inc.


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Nothing Makes People Scream With Laughter Like A Horror-Bly Funny T-Shirt

Black Lagoon Bottom Dwellers by Art Broken

Comedy goes surprisingly well with tragedy, and our favorite horror movies often feature comedic elements that go great with all the blood and gore.

It's no surprise horror movie fans have a darker sense of humor than most, so if you're looking for a shirt that'll make people laugh their heads off then enter the NeatoShop...if you dare!

There's all kinds of scary stuff going on in the world today, from entire countries turning strange

God Save The THING by Gimetzco!

To the living developing an unhealthy obsession with the undead

Till Death Tears Us Apart by OPIPPI

And then there's the horror of the upcoming presidential election...

Every Vote Counts by Boggs Nicolas

No wonder we're all looking for a reason to smile!

No Trouble by Ikado

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The Star-Spangled Banner at the Lincoln Memorial

Star Genleah Swain was touring the Lincoln Memorial in Washington and was inspired. The acoustics are good, the feeling was there, so she gave in to a dare from her companions and sang the Star Spangled Banner right there in with a bunch of tourists. And she nailed it.

(YouTube link)

A good time was had by all. -via Viral Viral Videos


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World Map Turns into Bicyclist Silhouette

Thomas Yang, an artist and creative director in Singapore, has a real gift for conveying ideas in new ways. He makes many posters that promote bike-riding, such as one in which he printed the Empire State Building with bike tires.

One of his recent works titled Tour de World advocates bicycling for environmental purposes by re-arranging the nations of the world into the image of a bicycle and rider.

-via Fubiz


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Cats and Dogs Research Review

The following is an article from The Annals of Improbable Research, now in all-pdf form. Get a subscription now for only $25 a year!

(Image credit: Flickr user dixie wells)

Research in, on, or about cats and dogs
by Nan Swift, Improbable Research staff

Dogs and Cats as Fall Hazards (2006)
Nonfatal Fall-Related Injuries Associated with Dogs and Cats --- United States, 2001-2006,” Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report, vol. 58, no. 11, March 27, 2009, pp. 277-281. The report states:

The findings indicate that, in 2006, cats and dogs were associated with approximately 1% of the estimated 8 million fall injuries treated in Emergency Departments and affected persons of all ages. Walking dogs and chasing pets were associated with the greatest number of injuries.

Dogs and Cats as Fall Hazards (2010)
Dogs and Cats as Environmental Fall Hazards,” Judy A. Stevens, S.L. Teh, and Tadesse Haileyesus, Journal of Safety Research, vol. 41, no. 1, February 2010, pp. 69-73. The authors, at the Division of Unintentional Injury Prevention, National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Atlanta, Georgia, report:

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Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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God Mode ON

Should a driverless car be programmed with ethics? They will have to be. In the hypothetical scenario in which a driver must decide between risking the lives of pedestrians or risking the life of passengers in the car, an autonomous car must make that decision in a split second. Dr. Iyad Rahwan of MIT’s Media Lab is looking at the problem.

To understand that question Dr Rahwan and his team conducted an online survey to see how people feel about cars handling the social dilemma.

Overall they found that people were largely utilitarian, favouring the protection of the greater number of lives. For instance, they would favour the car being programmed to drive into a wall rather than a crowd of people.

Certainly not surprising. However, that sense of utilitarianism didn’t remain when people were asked if they would buy a car with such programming. Instead self interest prevailed for hypothetical buyers preferring to purchase a car that would save themselves even if it meant killing many others.

Yes, it’s always easier to answer hypothetical ethics questions than to contemplate buying a vehicle that may someday decide to kill you in order to save others. That’s the gist of the latest comic from CommitStrip.


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The Elevator That Goes Sideways, Up, and Down


(Video Link)

Genoa, Italy is a very hilly place, so there are already many lifts and trams that carry passengers, around, up, and down. But what makes the elevator at d'Albertis-Montegalletto Castle novel is that its elevator goes both vertically and horizontally as needed.

To get to the castle, you take the elevator horizontally through a tunnel for about 300 meters. Then the elevator goes up the mountain to the castle.

How does it work? Tom Scott explains that elevators have to move along only one axis to be safe. So the designers of this elevator arranged for the elevator to enter a second one before it makes its ascent. Although it looks like one elevator, mechanically speaking, it's actually two.

-via The Presurfer


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The Mysterious Origins of Sausage

What can you say about sausage? That it’s funny because of its phallic shape, that you can’t always know what’s in it (and that’s scary), and just about every culture around the world has it. Sausages vary from place to place, and in different eras, and the variety of force meat in casings means it can even be hard to define.  

The ubiquity of the food makes it hard to trace its first moments on Earth; sausages were a solution to a problem that every culture was likely to come up against. “Sausages were created originally for two reasons: One, to make use of every little piece of the meat, so nothing is wasted, and two, by using salt and smoking, it was a way to preserve it,” explains Gary Allen, author of Sausages: A Global History, pointing to the rise of coordinated hunting and the ability to pull down increasingly larger game as one of the conditions that led to the birth of sausages.

Read about the development of sausage and the many different sausages of the world at Atlas Obscura.

(Image credit: Flickr user oatsy40)

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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Pizzeria Uses Robot to Prepare Pies, Bakes Them on Delivery Truck

Her name is Marta. She's the next generation in pizza chefs. Marta, who is a robot, assembles pizzas, then gives them to another robot named Bruno. Bruno loads the pizzas into an oven where they bake partially--but not all of the way.

The pizzas are then loaded onto delivery trucks. Each truck has 56 ovens. When a computer calculates that the truck is 3 minutes and 15 seconds away from the destination, it turns the oven on.

So when the customer gets the pizza, it's extremely fresh because it just came out of the oven.

This is the business model for Zume, a new startup located 2 minutes away from Google's headquaters in Mountain View, California. Bloomberg News (auto-start) investigated what may the the future of food:

"We are going to be the Amazon of food," said Zume's co-founder and executive chairman, Alex Garden. […]

Garden is confident it won't be long before he's competing with the major pizza chains. "Just imagine Domino's without the labor component," said Garden. "You can start to see how incredibly profitable that can be."

-via @ClarkHat


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Library Cat to be Evicted

The public library in White Settlement, Texas, has a cat named Browser who’s lived there for six years. He greets library patrons, scares away mice, and acts as a mascot for the library’s various fundraising activities. But the White Settlement City Council has voted 2-1 to remove the library cat, giving Browser has 30 days to find a new home.  

On Tuesday, the White Settlement City Council voted to remove Browser, the cat that has lived in the library for the past six years.  This came despite an outpouring of support for the cat.  The council chambers were full, with most in attendance there to voice their support for Browser.

Discussions on this item began with Mayor Ronald A. White, who spoke in support of Browser. Council member Dave Mann also voiced his support of keeping the cat in the library.  Eight members of the audience also spoke, each of them voicing their approval for keeping Browser in the library.  Reasons given were his pest control abilities, his ability to draw children to the library, and the fact that he is loved by the people of the city.  A petition signed by 618 people who support keeping the cat in the library was also mentioned.  

The reason given was that some people may be allergic to cats, although a few people who are allergic spoke in favor of keeping Browser. Browser has until July 14th to find a new home. The cat’s supporters want his fate to be put to a vote in a city-wide referendum. Some reminded the council members that their positions are also up to a vote in November. -via Buzzfeed

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Mini Batgirl - She May Be Pint Sized, But She Still Packs A Punch!


Mini Batgirl by Oliver Banks

She may not have the moves, the fancy gadgets or the muscles to match old Bats, but Batgirl has one power the Caped Crusader will never have- the power of cuteness. This may seem like a power that would be of no use when squaring off against the super-powered villains in the Rogue's Gallery, but you'd be surprised how effective a bat of the lashes and a smile can be against a guy. And if there's one thing Batgirl and bad girls like Harley Quinn, Catgirl and Poison Ivy have in common it's the ability to get guys, no matter how villainous, to do their bidding!

Charm your fellow Batfans into submission with this Mini Batgirl t-shirt by Oliver Banks, it's a mighty powerful way to declare your love for the cutest member of the Bat Family!

Visit Oliver Banks's Facebook fan page and Tumblr, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more mighty cool designs:

Mini Harley Quinn Doctor Who Seuss WE ARE GROOT Mini Wonder Woman

View more designs by Oliver Banks | More Comic T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!


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Man Marries His Smartphone

If we're going to be honest with ourselves, we connect with our phones on so many emotional levels. We look to it for solace, to calm us down, to put us to sleep, to ease our minds. And to me, that's also what a relationship is about. So, in a sense, my smartphone has been my longest relationship.

And so Aaron Chervenak, a film director, took his phone to a Las Vegas wedding chapel and married her.

There was even a wedding ring--in this case, one built into the cell phone case.

I hope their relationship lasts. Unfortunately, these days, many married people want to upgrade to a newer model after a few years.

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Hey, Mister Snake

Um, don’t tease a snake. This woman found a particularly long snake in her yard in Alabama. She didn’t have to touch it. Snakes can get defensive about that.

(YouTube link)

She was actually quite lucky she was recording with her smart phone. He could have went straight to her face! -via Viral Viral Videos


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A Song of Ice and Fire Cocktail

(Image by Gizmodo)

Taking a literal interpretation of the title of George R.R. Martin's famous novel series, Cocktail Chemistry shows us how to make a cocktail inspired by Game of Thrones.

It's a sophisticated variant of the ice ball cocktail, which we've seen previously. There's liquor inside the hollow sphere of ice. The fire comes from a high proof rum in the bottom of the glass. When ignited, the fire melts the bottom of the ice sphere, causing it collapse and the drink components to mix.


(Video Link)

-via That's Nerdalicious!


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Falling Tide

A young boy is kicked off the train, and isn't allowed back on. Will it take off without him? Can he get his parents’ attention? He doesn’t have much time before the waves come in! This surreal story is told in wordless anime style.

(vimeo link)

Animation student Ning Cheng produced this at CalArts. If you get to the end and still don’t understand the allegory, read the first comment. -via reddit


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Color Photos Of The Rio Beaches In The 1970s

The beaches of Rio De Janeiro, Brazil are largely considered to be the finest in the world, and when folks head down to Brazil on vacation the trip isn't complete without a beach outing.

With names like Ipanema, Copacabana and Praia Vermelha, the beaches of Rio sound like magical places far removed from the favelas in the city, and those who've been say it all washes away when you're at the beach in Rio.

Canadian photographer Blake W. Smith was on the Rio scene back in 1978, using his trusty Nikon to capture all the bronze bodies, beautiful coastline and local color found on the sunniest beaches in Brazil.

See more Stunning Color Pictures Of Rio Beaches In The 1970s here


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2 Types of Travelers

You’ve found the perfect vacation getaway. Now all you have to do is get there. Are you looking forward to the travel experience, or do you consider it the necessary evil you must endure to really start your vacation once you get there? Sarah Cooper at The Cooper Review divides travelers into two types. Which type you are depends on what you are doing at the time, so there is a lot of crossover. This division only pertains to how adventurous you are. Check out the entire collection of comics to peg yourself -or someone you’ve traveled with.


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Anxiety Magazine Covers

Are you behind on reading Anxiety magazine? Did your subscription order go through, or did you accidentally order two subscriptions?

You've got a lot to worry about and Anxiety magazine is here to keep you informed of the latest vexations. Crayon Elyse photoshopped covers for 5 issues of this non-existent periodical. You can view them all at Pleated Jeans. Say hello to this man who seems to know you, but you can't remember his name or where you met him.

View more fun pics over at our NeatoPicto Blog

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World's Laziest Wolf Howls

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m expected to join in, and my instincts tell me I should, but honestly, guys, I’d just as soon take a nap. Maybe just a little 'woo' will do."

(YouTube link)

His name is Alawa, and he’s a gray wolf at the Wolf Conservation Center (WCC) in South Salem, New York. -via Tastefully Offensive

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Pro Tip: You Don't Need to Shower

(Photo: Tom)

Do you bathe on a regular basis? Stop. You don't need to.

James Hamblin, a physician, explains in The Atlantic that it's unnecessary. Your body will naturally regulate its own filth if you would just leave it alone:

The odor of bodies is the product of bacteria that live on our skin and feed off of the oily secretions from the sweat and sebaceous glands at the base of our hair follicles. Applying detergents (soaps) to our skin and hair every day disrupts a sort of balance between skin oils and the bacteria that live on our skin. When you shower aggressively, you obliterate the ecosystems. They repopulate quickly, but the species are out of balance and tend to favor the kinds of microbes that produce odor.

But after a while, the idea goes, your ecosystem reaches a steady state, and you stop smelling bad.

Hamblin put the theory to the test on himself. It worked! His friends tell him that he doesn't stink:

And everything is fine. I wake up and get out the door in minutes. At times when I might’ve smelled bad before, like at the end of a long day or after working out,  I just don’t. At least, to my nose. I’ve asked friends to smell me, and they insist that it’s all good. (Though they could be allied in an attempt to ruin me.)

So knock it off with bathing. Live naturally. The people around you will appreciate it.

-via TYWKIWDBI


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The Law Hawk Is Back To Drop An Anchor Of Justice

Looking for a legal representative who won't bore you to death with their blandness?

Tired of being battered about like a little field mouse when you've got the heart of a bald eagle beating in your chest?

Then you're in the market for someone who is ready to tear justice a new one, you're looking to hire Bryan Wilson, the Texas Law Hawk.

(YouTube Link)

I know what you're thinking- was that Simon Pegg and Peter Dinklage playing river cops? The answer depends on your level of sobriety...


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Walker Extermination Service - Service With A Scowl


Walker Extermination Service by Winter Artwork Illustration

When you've got walkers in your yard tearing up your rose bushes and dripping their entrails everywhere you need a company who understands how to wipe out a walker infestation for good, you need to call the Dixon Brothers. Daryl and Merle were born to bash in zombie brains, and they offer a money back guarantee on all of their services- if they don't have the time of their life while making your home walker free then their visit is free!

Advertise and spread hope for the future with this Walker Extermination Service t-shirt by Winter Artwork Illustration, it's sure to make your fellow fans drop dead with delight!

Visit Winter Artwork Illustration's NeatoShop for more mighty cool designs:

Warning! Betrayal Tiger! Browncoats Forever Frosty Treats

View more designs by Winter Artwork Illustration | More TV T-Shirts | New T-Shirts

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You Could Rule the Universe With This Infinity Gauntlet Bracelet

If you're a fan of fine geek jewelry, then you really should check out Etsy seller The Bee Hive, where you can get necklaces, bracelets and earrings all inspired by beloved geek franchises like The Avengers and Supernatural. We're particularly in awe of this charming Infinitiy Gauntlet handchain that could almost certainly help you take over the world, if not the multiverse itself.

Via Geek Girls


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Megaplex Is The Most Insane Mashup Of 80s And 90s Nostalgia Ever

Fans of over-the-top cinema from the 80s and 90s don't stop loving those crazy flicks just because they're all grown up now, they just rewatch their favorite scenes online to relive the glory days.

Many of these iconic scenes came to define the era, serving as a pop culture primer for those sadly deprived of grindhouse culture and midnight movies, but it can be hard to serve up a proper dose of schlock.

So Ben Craw of Smash TV edited together the epic thousand piece movie McNugget meal for your eyeballs that is Megaplex. (NSFW)

(Vimeo Link)

Ben should issue a bonus prize for anyone who can identify every clip used in the making of this crazy supercut, and a super bonus prize for watching the whole thing!

-Via GeekTyrant


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9 Behind-the-Scenes Secrets of a Shark Week Cinematographer

Shark Week is upon us, as it has been for 28 years. While we marvel at the awesomeness of the predators of our nightmares, you have to wonder about the folks who actually get in the water with them to get the footage. Andy Brandy Casagrande IV, in addition to having the world’s most awesome name, is a shark cinematographer. He’s the one who gets a great white shark to say "cheese" for the camera. He shares some tidbits about his job with us.

The shark-proof cage so often seen in TV specials serves a real purpose. Casagrande is well-known for diving without one, but there are times when even he prefers the security a cage can provide. “The cage protects you from sharks that might be a little more bitey than usual,” Casagrande says. “It can keep you safe from sharks that might sneak up on you, or if visibility is bad, or in the dark.”

Sharks have unique personalities just like people, according to Casagrande. “If you’re at a party or a bar and you see some dude that has bloody knuckles or a black eye, and he looks angry, that’s not the kind of guy you walk up to and stick your GoPro in his face," he says. "Often if a shark is all chewed up and looks like a brawler, that shark is not afraid to engage in conflict.” But many sharks are ambush predators, and so you may not see that brawler coming—hence the cage.

Read more about being a shark cinematographer at mental_floss.

(Image source: Andy Brandy Casagrande IV at Facebook)


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Duck and Dog Play Chase


(Video Link)

The duck's only chance is to outwit his much faster opponent. Perhaps he could double back and catch the dog behind him Or, like Khan in Star Trek II, his opponent may be thinking in 2 dimensions instead of 3. He could fly over the rock to catch his foe from above.

-via Jonah Goldberg

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10 Must-See Islands You’ve Probably Never Heard Of

If you go to France, you may as well skip the Louvre because it’s overrun with tourists. If you go to Italy, you may be disappointed in how commercialized the Leaning Tower of Pisa is. And if you are looking for a relaxing island getaway, you might do well to skip the most popular destinations and organized tours, and try one of the beautiful, lesser-known islands of the world. Like the volcano called Aogashima.

About 358 km away from Tokyo, Japan is the small, volcanic island called Aogashima. It is the most isolated island of the Izu archipelago, though it is inhabited by approximately 200 villagers. The island is a crater made by a volcanic eruption, and inside the crater is another volcano. Its 1780s eruption classifies it as active, because nearly half of the people living there died. For more than fifty years, nobody returned.

It is a lush tropical island in the Philippine Sea with a mysterious lure. Its serenity brings travelers to unwind in its geothermal sauna. The adventurous come to hike and cook their meals in the volcanic steam vents using pots provided at the sauna. Ferry and helicopter are the only options for reaching the island. It is a bit like Shangri La, only in the midst of the sea. It also comes with a warning that nobody knows when or if it will erupt again. The brave may reap the experience of a lifetime there.

See nine other surprising island destinations at Money Inc.


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Beware Kangaroos Claiming To Be Window Washers

People who live in a kangaroo-less country don't realize how dangerous those muscular marsupials can be when they're mad, but there's a reason they call a group of kangaroos a mob.

And thanks to this terrifying but true video footage shared by Gem 106 we're reminded why the world is better off without a bunch of bounding brutes banging on our windows.

(YouTube Link)

And you thought door-to-door salesmen were the most annoying creatures on the planet!

-Via FAILBlog

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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The Critters Are Coming!

The following article is from the book Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Nature Calls.

(Image credit: Joi Ito)

What happens when the delicate balance of nature tips in such a way that a particular animal population spikes to unsustainable levels? Pretty much what you’d expect: chaos… famine… and critters out the wazoo.

THE 48-YEAR CURSE

The wild bamboo forests in northwest India and parts of Burma are home to an odd curse: Every 48 years, like clockwork, they produce an army of hungry rats that devour the local rice crop. The phenomenon is called mautam (which translates to “bamboo death”) and is caused by the life cycle of melocanna bamboo, the local variety. The plants live for exactly 48 years, at which point entire forests die off simultaneously. But before they die, they produce a tremendous amount of seed-filled fruit. The fruit will replant the next generation of bamboo, but in the meantime, it also provides a huge increase in the amount of food available to the local black rat community.

(Image credit: Flickr user Matt Baume)

The sudden food surplus sets off a population boom. For as long as the good times last, the rats breed continuously. It takes only about 11 weeks for the baby rats to reach maturity. That means, during the year that the forest fruits, the rat population jumps exponentially every couple of months— from as few as 100 rats per acre to as many as 12,000 per acre. And at just about the time that the rat population is hitting its peak, the bamboo fruit runs out.

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